How to Get Busted Growing Weed Indoors- a Foolproof Guide
This unlikely title is a tongue in cheek sequel to an earlier book I wrote titled How to Grow Marijuana Indoors, a Foolproof Guide. My original grow guide has a complete chapter on security but these days it takes some effort to get busted for illegally growing marijuana for personal use. Several American states have already legalized various forms of pot use for medical needs and for personal pleasure and the states that have not already legalized pot are moving steadily in that direction. That means there are no more dope sniffing police dogs patrolling neighborhoods looking for indoor grow-ops. No more infrared police scanners looking for grow-op heat signatures. No more police promotions for busting Ma and Pa operations. Canadian Police are of a similar mind to their American brethren and don’t spend nearly as much time as they used to on arresting personal use cannabis growers. In fact the police in Vancouver have accepted personal pot use to such a degree that there are now dozens of street front retailers that currently sell marijuana in the city. So if the police are not that interested in busting pot growers anymore why are people still getting busted for growing personal marijuana crops? Here are some sure fire tips on how to get yourself busted for growing your own personal marijuana crop indoors.
1) Sell some of your pot. Most marijuana production busts are the result of informer tips. I personally believe that some dealers on the street are given an unofficial license to sell drugs by the cops as long as they regularly rat on fellow drug dealers and producers. The message here is clear. Unless you want to get busted do not sell your personal product even if it does mean earning a few extra dollars here and there. Understand that customers are not always as loyal as you might hope they should be when they see you charging hundreds of dollars for pot that they believe cost you nothing.
2) Steal the Hydro. One of the quickest ways to get busted is to steal the hydro by bypassing the meter. Not only is this a very dangerous practice but most hydro companies have entire divisions dedicated to tracking down hydro theft. The irony is that many people steal the hydro thinking that it is safer than having a large hydro bill. Of course you should not have a high hydro bill for a personal grow set-up unless you are time-share growing for the entire neighborhood! Do not steal hydro (or anything else) unless you want to spend time behind bars.
3) Give guided tours of your grow room. It is hard to resist showing someone the miracle of indoor marijuana growth when you are successfully producing big juicy buds in some dark corner of your basement. But never tell anyone about your garden who does not need to know and remember that your garden may last several years or decades but over that length of time even the best friendships sometimes turn sour.
4) Throw your fresh cannabis scraps out with the garbage. That’s one way to alert the authorities to your activities. There are also many other ways to announce your illegal pot growing to the world. Burn fresh green cannabis litter in the fireplace when it’s not windy outside so the marijuana smoke hangs over the street like a fog. Or roll giant fatties and show off to strangers who might wonder where your endless supply of superb weed comes from. Common sense is often forgotten after months and years of running a secret indoor garden. People come to think they have a license and often fail to follow their normal security procedures. Unless you want to get popped don’t fall into that trap.
5) Talk to the hydroponics store staff about your crop. Growers sometimes spend a lot of time hanging around the hydroponics store, rapping with the staff. They buy lots of equipment and supplies and park their home registered vehicle in front of the hydro-store. They talk about the “herb” instead of referring to their crop as tomatoes. They think of the hydroponics staff as friends when they don’t really know those people at all. When growing pot indoors always remember the old adage that “loose lips sink ships”.
6) Give attitude. Making enemies is a great way to get in trouble while growing cannabis. You can also throw loud parties where your guests smoke copious amounts of pot in view of your neighbors and their kids. Remember to be curt with the mailman or other tradesmen who come to your house and make sure you don’t give them tips at Christmas time. Instead of littering your front yard with children’s toys and swing sets, put up some no trespassing signs and buy/rent a few pit bulls to patrol your fenced yard.
These are all excellent tips on how to get in trouble for growing weed indoors. But there are many more ways to bring heat on your operation. You could decide not to bother setting up a proper vent system for your garden so that the house and property reek of skunk. Or you might use your personal credit cards instead of cash at the hydroponics stores thereby leaving a trail to your door. Or you could smoke dope while tooling around in the car on a public street and with a little luck the cops will search your home as well as your car. It’s usually a piss off for most people to get busted but if you are growing your own pot and determined to look for trouble these are a few guaranteed ways to find it.